


i've been waiting all this time to be (something i can't define)

by sleepyshamrocks



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Post Reveal, how lena went from angry to amused at seeing kara making up all these excuses, lena luthor is good and no one can wrench that from me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-10 04:35:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18931366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepyshamrocks/pseuds/sleepyshamrocks
Summary: The sight of all of them – Alex, Nia, Brainy, Kelly, J’onn – laughing together and beckoning her in, as if they all aren’t actively lying to her, deceiving her, smirking deceptively behind her back, leaves a bitter taste at the back of her throat, a lump that she isn’t sure that she has the willpower to swallow down anymore. But it’s Kara that she can’t tear her eyes away from, it’s Kara with her eyes crinkled at the edges and the way her face lights up when she comes in the door that leaves a cold, clean crack behind her sternum.“I didn’t know what to bring so I brought red and white,” Lena says through a smile, and when they cheer she wonders if she just traded a lying, ruthless, manipulative family for another one.Lena and the aftermath of the reveal.





	i've been waiting all this time to be (something i can't define)

**Author's Note:**

> supercorp is endgame i can feel it in my soul

She doesn’t see Kara in a new light.

She doesn’t see Supergirl in a new light too, actually. It’s as if all the puzzle pieces have finally clicked together into a single comprehensive image and she’s left with a picture that she didn’t want to see. The line between Kara and Supergirl is as thin as the fabric of a cape.

Her mind lingers on her brother for a brief moment. Lex had hated her so much that he spent his literal dying breath doing the one thing he’s always consistently done throughout her life: make her feel stupid. But in a way, she thanks him for it. It was kind of him to give her a parting gift, a reminder of how weak she’s become. Weak enough that denial has somehow become her most recurring emotion for two whole years when it comes to her own best friend. Kara Danvers: reporter, hero, sister, friend, liar.

And in that moment, she feels something else, too. Relief. She’s not Lex, and she’ll never become like him. There’s no burning desire to destroy Supergirl, no sharp words to spit at Kara, not even fury at their other friends. There’s only…disappointment, something cold and empty and blue and the only thing ringing in her head is, _why?_

It’s easy avoiding Kara. Lena is the CEO of a multimillion dollar company and Kara is being pulled in all directions with piling articles about the aftermath of the president’s arrest, Lockwood, Lex, Kaznia, everything. They’re both busy and it makes sense that oh, sorry, Lena can’t do lunch this week. Oh, sorry, Kara has to skip their weekly spin class, she has a source to interview. Oh, sorry, Lena isn’t feeling game night this week. Or the next. Or the one after that.

She hasn’t seen any of them since _that_ game night, actually. She wanted to see everyone for one last time, challenge her deductive skills and spot the cracks in their masks to see how many grins would be shared behind her back. But instead, her friends were…nice. Brainy had seemed genuinely shocked that she beat him in charades, and Kara had cheered the loudest when they won pictionary against the other pairs.

There’s a twinge of sadness lurking in her chest when they finish, and the goodbye that leaves her lips doesn’t taste as triumphant as she meant for it to be.

It’s Supergirl she meets first, almost a month after that. She supposes that it’s inevitable, that the DEO will have yet another alien problem that requires her technological and biological expertise and that one of them will be sent to contact her. She just stomps down the voice whining why Supergirl visited her before Kara did.

Supergirl lands on her balcony like she’s done countless times before, and Lena regards her with a tilt of the head. “I haven’t seen you in a while,” she muses.

The hero smiles, one that makes her eyes crinkle and her face light up. “Yeah! Sorry about that, some of the Children of Liberty still found it their job to round up aliens even after the Amnesty Act was reinstated, so I’ve been busy in the streets.”

“Small fish for Supergirl, isn’t it?” Lena takes another sip from her glass and leans against her table, and her heart skips a beat when she wonders if Kara’s superhearing can hear the insides of her thoughts, too.

“Nah, I honestly like it better like this. My friends and I get to blow off some steam without putting our necks in line.”

Lena raises an eyebrow. “Friends?”

“You know – Dreamer, Brainy, James. The superfriends.”

“Am I?”

“Are you what?”

“Am I your friend?”

Supergirl pshaws as if the question was unthinkable. “Of course you are. We helped saved the world together, didn’t we? Although,” her face softens, “I’m sorry you never got to speak with Lex before he, you know.”

Oh. Lena forgot that the world still doesn’t know about what really happened. They all think he died when his suit failed and hurtled to the island at a hundred miles an hour. A childish, petty side of her wants to gloat, _I have a secret too, you know._

Supergirl mistakes her silence for a moment of sadness, because she hurriedly continues with, “I know what it’s like to have genocidal murderers as family. I understand what you might be feeling right now.”

She has no idea. Lena places her glass down and turns away from the blonde, stepping near the glass window overlooking the city. “You know, I’ve told you all my secrets. Helping Lex, working with the Harun El, making synthetic Kryptonite.”

“I remember,” Supergirl answers carefully. Lena kind of wants to roll her eyes. She told Kara about the first one, not her alter ego. She wonders if Kara herself can draw the line between the two.

A part of Lena wants to push it, see how far she can go before she has the hero backed up against a corner with nowhere to run. _What about yours, Supergirl?_

Instead, she relents. Puts on a neutral smile, one that she doesn’t feel in her eyes. “So, what job does the DEO have waiting for me this time?”

Supergirl plays with her hands and looks away for a brief second. “Actually, um, I’m here to ask for your help. Just me. Off the record.”

“You’re coming to _me_ for a private matter?” Lena raises an eyebrow. “This must be big.”

“Yeah, uh, I need you to run some tests for me. Tests on my powers.”

“Why didn’t you just ask the DEO? I’m sure they have a better understanding of it than I do.”

Supergirl lets out a breath. Lena wonders how heavy her cape feels resting on her shoulders. “I haven’t told them yet. I - I just don’t think that they would, I mean -,”

“You’re confusing me here.” Lena settles on the couch and Supergirl follows suit, the blue and red clashing with the muted colors of her furniture. It’s unlike of Supergirl to look nervous, but Lena thinks that it’s not even the hero sitting opposite her. It’s Kara, needing someone to understand. “What do you need me to do?”

“I - I almost died that day,” Supergirl chokes out. “Your brother, he - the suit you made me already took too many hits, and he had his kryptonite weapon fully charged and I - for a second I really thought that I was about to die.”

Lena’s heart drops to her stomach. “What happened?”

“She saved me. Red Daughter. She flew in front of me and took the hit even though she had no reason and - and she died in my arms.” A brief realization that the Red Daughter was Kara’s clone too and not just Supergirl’s flashes through Lena, but she files that away for now. Her friend is hurting.

Supergirl leans into Lena's touch.

“I know that the Harun El split us into two, but until that point I hadn’t really considered her as part of myself, you know? I thought of her as Lex’s follower, someone who I could never in a million years be like no matter what. But she was a person, same as me. I tried to save everyone but I couldn’t even save myself.” The words are tight, as if she's trying to fight the lump rising in her throat.

“She knew what she was dying for. I think in the end she realized what Lex had done to her and understood how wrong it was,” Lena says gently.

Supergirl nods, blinks the tears away and takes a deep breath. How many people have seen National City’s protector cry? Lena wonders. In a two-thousand-dollar silk upholstery, no less.

Something in her chest moves. Why is Supergirl crying in front of her?

“Sorry, I didn’t come here to - to be emotional like this,” she chuckles wetly, “I really came to ask for your help. When Red Daughter died, she…dissolved, I guess, and I absorbed her powers. It was like mine were supercharged and I started doing things that I’ve never been able to do before.”

The scientist part of Lena is instantly piqued. “Like what?”

Supergirl looks around the room, then points at a decorative vase of flowers. “Do you mind?”

“Go ahead.”

The roses turn into ashes in a flash. Lena’s mouth gapes open. “Why is your heat vision purple?”

“It’s not just purple. It’s hotter, too, and it feels bigger somehow, like - like lightning is coming out of my eyes. And it’s not just this. I caused a sonic boom the other day because I was chasing a rogue alien. I’ve never done that before, not even at my fastest. My freeze breath became too endothermic to the point that it started sucking in heat from the whole building. It was like…one week I was fine, then the next my powers started getting out of control.”

Lena meets Supergirl’s gaze, a little confused. “I don’t really see why that would be a problem. If anything, isn’t it a good thing? Your powers are…evolving, in a sense.”

“But I don’t want it!” Supergirl cries out, jumping from her seat. “Last week, I nearly broke Al - Agent Danvers’ arm because I hugged her too hard. The last time I did that was when I was fifteen! Everything I touch breaks. Things are too loud. It’s like when I first landed here all over again.”

Lena still doesn’t understand. “Well yes, but…you managed to control it. Who’s to say that you can’t control this one, too? Your powers…they’ll be unlike anything this world has ever seen.”

Supergirl puts her face in her hands, and her reply comes out very, very quiet. “That’s the thing, Lena. I don’t want to feel like a god.”

Something shatters inside Lena, something already broken and bruised and hurting. Her mind screams _liar, traitor, enemy_ and her heart whispers _help her._

The answer leaves her lips without resistance. “I’ll help you.”

They work overnight in the company lab, Lena’s genius and Supergirl’s speed and knowledge on alien biophysics making them an effective team. In the end, the solution is disappointingly easy. Lena uses the remains of her work on Kryptonite to synthesize new ones with a higher concentration of radiation, enough to weaken Supergirl and allow Lena to redo the extraction procedure she did with Sam.

“Why didn’t you come to me sooner?” Lena asks, later after Supergirl is shaking the effects of Kryptonite away and rising from her bed. She caps the contraption buzzing with purple energy and makes a note to try deionizing it later lest they want the risk of the building blowing up. When Supergirl doesn’t reply, Lena looks up and sees the blonde chewing on her lip. “What?”

“I - I didn’t know if you wanted to see me.”

“Why would that be?”

Supergirl answers like it’s physically causing her pain to do so. “I killed Lex. I thought you would hate me for that.”

Lena deflates. Hopes Supergirl’s enhanced sight won’t catch the tremble in her chin, even though she knows that it’s practically impossible. Still, the hero is polite enough not to say anything.

_It wasn’t you it was me it was me it was me._

“I could never hate you for that.” That one, at least, is genuine. “The world is a worse place with him in it. There wasn’t any other way.”

The early morning sunlight lingers on Supergirl’s hair and god, it’s so hard to see her as a powerful alien when all Lena can see is Kara. “Still, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, really.”

Lena fiddles with the Kryptonite container, noting how Supergirl’s eyes fall on them. The blonde just shoots her a small smile and says, “thank you for helping me.”

“No problem. But, um, what do you want me to do with this?” she indicates to the Kryptonite.

Supergirl shakes her head. “Do whatever you want with it. I trust you. You should know that by now.”

 _Really?_ the bitter part of Lena hisses.

“And the energy we extracted from you? Are you going to take it to the DEO?”

“No, no,” Supergirl says quickly. “I don’t…want to tell them about the Red Daughter thing. J’onn will understand but the others…they won’t. And Alex will just yell at me for getting rid of those powers without testing them first. You keep it. I’m sure it’ll benefit you well.”

Lena scoffs incredulously. “Are you sure? If this falls to the wrong hands, we might have the Harun El superpower problem all over again.”

“It’s not in the wrong hands. It’s in yours.” And with that, Supergirl bids her goodbye, the whoosh of her take off swirling things around before they finally settle down without sound.

 

 

For some odd reason, it’s easier seeing Supergirl than it is seeing Kara. Logically, Lena knows that they’re the same person, and it’s practically all but confirmed by Kara herself by the way she always slips up between her two personas (when Supergirl instinctively came for a hug, Lena pointedly hugged her back for two seconds before the blonde remembered who she was supposed to be at that moment), but the weight that settles deep in her chest always seems to feel heavier when she’s around Kara.

Supergirl wasn’t the one who lied to her. Supergirl didn’t have an obligation or a moral duty to reveal her secret identity. Supergirl is a hero, a protector, a symbol. Kara Danvers was the one who lied to her face every day for two whole years.

Lena’s more rational side has taken over since Supergirl came to her for help, and she understands that Kara probably kept making excuses not to visit because she was dealing with her sudden change in powers, but that doesn’t stop her from sniding, “are you here for another article?” in such a petty way during the next time they meet that even Kara is taken aback, pausing her steps in front of her office door.

“I - I was here to see you.”

“Did you fly here on a bus this time?” She doesn’t even have it in her to feel embarrassed about saying it. It’s unlike her to be so…childish, but sometime between Supergirl’s first visit and this one, her anger has simmered down into a moody sense of petulance: annoyed, sure. Furious, a little. But the seething rage has quieted, nothing like how it was in the beginning.

She doesn’t want to, but she gets it. She has reasons for keeping her secrets and Kara probably has hers too. Lena doesn’t want to be something else in the list of what Kara has to worry about on top of everything else. For some reason, her stupid, stubborn heart refuses to stay resentful.

Seeing Supergirl cry tends to do that to someone.

Kara slowly puts down the bags of takeout on the table. “No, I came here from CatCo by foot. I thought we could have lunch together, since we haven’t seen each other for a month.” She looks so, so confused and Lena wants to do nothing more than ask, _why?_

Instead, she relents. “You know, Supergirl was here a few days ago. She asked for my help.”

“Oh yeah?” Kara fidgets with her glasses. “What did she want?”

“She said she was having trouble with her powers. Which reminds me, I think Lex might have left something about the Red Daughter on one of his diaries, and I might be able to use it to help Supergirl. Remember when we went to Shelley Island? How many were there lying in his room?”

“Oh, I don’t know. I think there were ten contained in the chessboard, give or take,” Kara answers, absentmindedly opening the takeout containers.

Lena wants to groan. She went with Supergirl to that goddamn cell. At this point, she wants Kara to confess just because she can’t stand cringing every time she has to see Kara slip up or grasp for another excuse.

“Potstickers?”

“Yes, please.”

“So, what have you been up to these days?” Kara says after swallowing down a mouthful of chicken.

“Rebranding, mostly. I honestly don’t know if the company can recover, what with this being the second time the Luthor name gets dragged through the public.”

Kara opens her mouth, maybe to apologize, but Lena cuts her off. “I’m still thankful for your article. The people deserve to know the truth. But I just…I don’t know if they can trust us anymore. Trust me.” She takes a deep breath. “Sometimes I wonder if I still deserve forgiveness.”

Kara places a hand on her arm before she can even finish. “Hey, the people know that you weren’t involved with him. And besides, you have me. I’ll always be on your side.”

She says it so earnestly, and Lena finds herself caving in, wonders if Kara’s roster of powers includes hypnotization. “I was, though. I told you I helped him in the beginning. Maybe - maybe if I hadn’t, he wouldn’t have had the chance to do all of that. It was only because I helped him that he could hurt y - hurt Supergirl,” she admits. The guilt has been eating at her for a month, gnawing on her conscience until it even overpowered her hurt at Kara’s betrayal.

She ignored the voice in her head warning that Lex was just manipulating her. Other people paid the price for it.

Kara hesitates before answering. “I don’t think Supergirl holds you accountable for that. Besides, I’m sure she understands why you didn’t tell anyone about it. Some secrets….are better off coming out at the right time.”

Lena’s heart starts racing. Kara’s hands are fiddling with her glasses, like she’s contemplating of taking it off, and Lena should feel anticipatory, excited, foreboding, but instead she feels suffocated.

She doesn’t want the intimacy of Kara revealing herself as Supergirl to be imprinted within the cold, impersonal walls of her office. If this is where their friendship ends, she doesn’t want to be reminded of it every day when she walks in.

“Look, I -,” Kara starts.

Lena abruptly stands from her seat. “Kara, it’s been lovely having you here, but I’m afraid that I have a lot of work to finish. The board is demanding for a proposal to turn our stocks back up.” She gestures vaguely to her desk, knowing that Kara won’t ask any more questions. She doesn’t. The blonde brushes nonexistent crumbs from her dress and stands, and for a moment Lena’s breath catches when she imagines the steel underneath the soft skin.

Kara grins and pulls her into a hug, and steel isn’t supposed to feel this warm. “I’ll leave you to it then.”

It’s only after she leaves the office that Lena entertains the idea that Kara might have avoided her for the past month because she was afraid of hurting her.

 

 

She gets kidnapped. Again. Lena is so used to it by now that she doesn’t even try to play the unassuming civilian role begging to be released. The only surprise is that she wakes up in her own lab this time. Even through the dissipating haze, she feels a spike of worry that her captors were brave enough to abduct and keep her in L-Corp property. Brave, stupid, desperate.

Still, she makes it a point to complain about the quality of ropes tying her hands down. Bad guys are surprisingly sensitive when their budget of operation gets called out.

One of them, the leader, she presumes, looms threateningly over her. “We know you extracted Supergirl’s powers and kept it in external storage. Where is it?” he demands, the voice distortion program lowering his tone an octave lower. It would’ve sounded more menacing if it wasn’t so autotune-y.

“And what do you want to do with it?” Lena prompts, unafraid. “It’s not like thugs like you know how to handle pure alien energy, anyway. You’re going to explode yourselves.”

She can see an outline of a grin under his balaclava. “Oh, don’t worry about that. Your brother left us a pretty clear outline of what to do.”

“Lex? What does he - his diaries.” Lena’s eyes widen in realization. “But - but we took all of it with us,” she sputters.

“I lived two cells down from him for six years. I could see the fake floorboard from there. It wasn’t hard to open it up when Shelley Island descended into chaos when you and Supergirl paid a visit. Thanks for that, by the way.” Behind him, his goons guffaw in agreement. “Now answer the question. Where is it?”

“It’s dangerous. We don’t know how pure, unfiltered energy will react with human equipment. The outcome will be catastrophic,” Lena says desperately, straining against the chair. For the first time, she curses the soundproof walls of her lab.

“Might be,” he corrects her.

“Look, if you’re planning to make weapons, don’t. It’s too dangerous,” she pleads.

“Weapons? You think we’d waste it on building guns?” the guy mocks, his laughter muffled by the mask. “You are disappointingly short-sighted, Miss Luthor. Why build weapons when I can be one myself?”

Lena rolls her eyes. This is the exact thing she told Supergirl last week, and she hates it when her pessimism gets proven right. Honestly, on top of having to keep the company from drowning, juggling her friendship with Kara, and dealing with the public fallout, the universe just had to add being kidnapped to her plate? Irritation flares in her chest, and though she knows it’s a bad idea, she snaps at him. “Really? You’re going to use it to get superpowers? After everything that happened with Lex and Lockwood, you really think it’s a good idea to do that?” She makes a show of raising her palms as best as possible with her wrists tied down. “It’s your suicide, not mine.”

The man growls. “Tell us where it is.”

“Feel free to turn this place upside down. You won’t find it.”

He regards her with angry eyes, then gestures to one of his men, who hands him a thick stack of papers. He makes a show of selecting one from the pile and shows it to her. With a jolt, Lena realizes that they’re pictures of Kara. Kara in CatCo, Kara lining up in Noonan’s, Kara throwing her head back to drink a shot in the Alien Bar. Her heart seizes in fear. If even Supergirl hadn’t realized that someone was stalking her, what does that say about these people?

She blurts out the words without thinking. “Don’t hurt her.” It’s illogical, she knows that Kara is perfectly capable of protecting herself, but if there’s even the slightest chance that she’s wrong, that Lex is manipulating her from beyond the grave, that Kara isn’t Supergirl after all…

“It would be a shame if something would happen to Miss Danvers, wouldn’t it? I have one of my people standing by right now at my command.” He indicates to a walkie talkie hanging off his hips. “One word, and she -,”

The talkie suddenly buzzes to life, and Lena hears a static shout before the line goes dead.

The next thing she knows, the wall to her right bursts into rubble, knocking some of the henchmen to the floor. Supergirl steps out of the hole, and through the dust Lena sees that the hero’s eyes have zeroed in on her.

Supergirl fights with vengeance, and her punches look a little less held back. One of the men manages to taser her, but it only seems to make her angrier. She uses her heat vision to burn his hand and the second he drops it, she does a roundhouse kick that knocks him out cold. Another one tries to ram her with a sharp piece of experimental machinery lying on a worktop, but Lena outstretches her leg and trips him, sending him sprawling into the floor and ending with Supergirl’s boot on his chest. Lena tries not to cringe when she hears the loud clang of her prototype smashing on the floor as if it were a toy and not a thousand-dollar project that she’s been working on for the past four months.

“You okay?” Supergirl asks her when all the men are sprawled on the floor. She lasers the ropes binding Lena’s arms.

“I’m fine. At least these people weren’t sent by Lex, so it wasn’t a hundred percent chance that they wanted me dead,” she says, rubbing her wrists.

“What was it about this time?”

She sighs. “They wanted the energy I extracted from you. I told you it was going to be the Harun El thing all over again.”

Supergirl furrows her brows and it looks familiar, like the face Kara likes to make when watching Lena eat kale salad during their lunch dates. Bewilderment mixed with guilty fascination. “Seriously? After the Lex thing? They still wanted to mess with superpowers?”

Lena throws her hands up. “That’s what I said, and they wouldn’t listen to me. Honestly, you’d think that there would be wisdom in learning from other people’s mistakes, I had half a mind to let them blow themselves up, it was ridiculous…,” her words trail off when she realizes that Supergirl isn’t looking at her. Her gaze is trained at the ground instead, and Lena feels her heart drop when she follows her line of sight: the pictures of Kara that fluttered all over the place when Supergirl blasted in.

“So, um, how did you find me here? The walls of this lab are soundproof,” she continues nervously, trying the ignore the very glaring elephant in the room

Supergirl blinks. “Lena, soundproof to you doesn’t mean the same thing to me.”

“Right, right.”

“I hate to state the obvious, but why are there pictures of - of Kara Danvers lying on the floor?”

“Photography class gone wrong?” she offers, but Supergirl doesn’t look amused. “Fine, they were threatening to hurt her if I didn’t give up the energy. She’s my…I don’t know if she still is, but she used to be my best friend, so they tried to use her to get to me.” She just got kidnapped, who’s going to blame her for being shady? Sue her.

Supergirl takes a shaky breath and steps closer, arms outstretched. “Lena, about that, I -,”

“It wouldn’t have worked, anyway,” Lena cuts her off.

“Hmm?”

“Threatening her wouldn’t have worked.”

“Oh? Why is that?” Supergirl schools her expression to look casual, and it only succeeds to make Lena pinch the bridge of her nose.

“Honestly, Kara, at first I was hurt that you didn’t tell me, but now it’s just plain painful watching you try to fumble your way to another excuse. At least spare me the second hand embarrassment.”

Supergirl’s shoulders drop, and that’s all the confirmation she needs. “Lena, I’m so sorry - I wanted to tell you, I was _going_ to tell you before all this, more than once, actually, like on the plane back from Kaznia and then the first game night after that and then - wait, how did you know?”

“Lex told me. Long story short, he didn’t die on Shelley Island. He portalled his way into his hideout, I confronted him, he told me about you and a bunch of things I already knew about myself, and I - I shot him. That’s where he died.” The back of her eyes prickle, but she refuses to shed another tear for Lex.  

Supergirl looks even more taken aback. “Wait, you shot - he didn’t die - you _knew_? All this time? Why didn’t you say anything? Why aren’t you…angry?”

Lena steps closer to her. “I was, at first. You can’t believe how much it hurt to know that every single one of your friends are in on a secret that you weren’t trusted to know.” She holds a hand up to stop Supergirl’s protests. “But then I had time to think it over, and honestly…Kara, you’re the least confrontational person I’ve ever met. I figured that you probably kept wanting to put off difficult conversations, and it would kind of be hypocritical for me to be mad at you about that.”

“So…you’re not mad?” Supergirl asks hesitantly, but Lena can see the hope shining in her blue eyes.

“I’m not mad,” she says, and it’s honest. None on the anger from last month is still lingering in her heart, and she’s relieved. Turns out that she does have it in her to forgive. “A little hurt, yes.  But mostly entertained. I started playing spot-the-difference games whenever you came around. And besides, I kept that secret about Lex, too. Now we’re even.”

Supergirl breaks into a grin and oh, this is the first time that the sun has shined on these walls. “No more secrets?”

“No more secrets.”

They stand there, smiling at each other like dorks for a minute until Lena suddenly remembers something. “Hey, why did you get here so late?”

“Huh?”

“I mean, you came bursting in five minutes ago, and I’ve probably been here for an hour before I woke up. If you didn’t get an alert the first time, what suddenly tipped you off?”

Kara blushes a bright red and mumbles something unintelligible, hiding her face in embarrassment.

“What?”

“I was, um, listening. To your heartbeat.”

“ _My heartbeat?_ ”

Kara shuffles her feet awkwardly. “Yeah, I - I do that sometimes. Your heart rate went through the roof a few minutes ago, so I followed it. Don’t know why it didn’t happen from the beginning, though.”

Now it’s Lena’s turn to blush. “I think I know why.” Her eyes track the scattered prints on the floor, then meet Kara’s questioning gaze. “Do you…want to talk about this upstairs?”

“Like, in your office?”

“Yeah. You’ve always been there either as Supergirl or Kara. You don’t have to worry about any of that now. We can start over.”

Kara stares at her, and Lena finds herself backtracking. “You don’t have to, I just meant -,”

“Lena,” Kara says softly, and all Lena can see is blue and red and gold. “I’d love to.”

**Author's Note:**

> n e way i'm really excited to see the direction that the writers are going to take in season 5 EXCEPT if it's evil lena i'm going to disown this show


End file.
